Dogs don’t buy dog food, people do. That’s why they have brands like “Prime Rib Slices,” “Sirloin Tidbits,” and “Porterhouse Morsels.” Stuff people like.

Dogs don’t give a damn. If dogs went to the store, cans would have labels like “Smelly Sox,” “Postman’s Leg,” or “My Own Rear End.”

Christmas nowadays is pretty much the same. It’s all about buying stuff. Stuff that you want for yourself but you’re going to foist off on your friends and relatives. Buy your wife that pipe wrench she’s always wanted, I’m sure she’ll let you borrow it later.

OK, I’m a bit of a Grinch, I’ll admit it. I like mince pies and traditional carols, but Rudolph you can keep. And Hawaiian Christmas melodies are for the … tourists.

So what’s gotten into me anyway? When I was a kid, I couldn’t wait. No plastic trees for us, the scent of spruce or juniper and lots of lights and silver bells. I grew up in the Midwest before global warming and there was always snow outside when you got up so early in morning, long before your parents were ready to face the festivities.

Old guys like to say things ain’t what they used to be, but the truth is, they ain’t. Yes, we had the faux merriment of Macy’s and Marshall Field’s, and Bing Crosby sang saccharine songs of the season, but you weren’t required to wallow in it and you could pretty much avoid it if you wanted. Now we’re drowning in late autumnal “marketing.”

Why is this?

Could it be because our lives are continually diminished by the drive to consume and the drive to consume is propelled by the logic of unfettered capitalism? That’s what a lot of my friends on the left say.

Or is it because we have lost sight of God and “the true meaning of Christmas?” That’s what a lot of my friends on the right say.

Here’s what I say: It’s both.

Our economy is so skewed toward consumer spending that without things like “Black Friday,” a lot of retailers would go bankrupt.

At the same time, advertising for consumption has come to help fill the void caused by the loss of personal identity – I am what I can own, I wear Adidas, I drive a Porsche, if I only had a Rolex people could see who I really am.

Consumerism is basically self-gratification and the promotion of consumer goods relies on creating a sense of entitlement. “You deserve a break today!” Really? What have you done to deserve a break?

No wonder we’ve lost sight.